squirrel helicopter


On the results page for a Google image search for “squirrel” it sometimes says :
“Related searches:  squirrel helicopter”.

The results for “squirrel helicopter” are a bit of a disappointment. But fixable.

squirrelhelicopter

We can rebuild him. We have the technology. Better than he was before. Better, stronger, faster.

Few things say “keep your hands off my nuts” like a gatling gun.

(Note that two contrarotating rotors eliminate the need for a tail rotor. He’d look pretty stupid with a tail rotor on his tail and the main rotor sticking out of his head.)

What More Needs To Be Said?


Via Rachel Lucas.

ROFL!

A Picture Says A Thousand Words


I present to you something which should be official campaign publications for McCain-Palin 2008, delivered to me from the truly excellent Captain Heinrichs.

Go Palin!

Sarah Palin riding her official vehicle

Sarah Palin riding her official vehicle

Kangaroos Run Amok


Ok, well, not really. These ones are trained to take school children to school every day, because in Australia, it’s cheaper to ride a kangaroo than it is to take a car. Most Australians don’t even own cars, that’s just propaganda we put out to make us seem as cool as the Americans.

Kangaroos Running Amok

Kangaroos Running Amok

I have a kangaroo. I call him Macky. He just ignores me most of the time.

Kangaroo transport isn’t as reliable as it sounds.

DUCK!


What a little showoff!

Duck Showing Off

Duck Showing Off

I will say, that is one of the coolest photos I’ve ever had the privilege of taking. That duck was incredibly happy to pose for me. Walked right up, no doubt expecting food, and it came right up for photos.

I SAID DUCK!

I SAID DUCK!

Melbourne Has Deformed Local Wildlife


Further to confusion about ducks, this is what a deformed duck looks like:

Duck spotted at Lake Aura Vale, Victoria.

I Drawed A Bear


Bear

I drew a bear. Not a very good bear, but a bear nonetheless.

Cuddles

I demand that Kevin Rudd and Peter Garrett send me my arts grant immediately!

Disclaimer: The bear’s bald spot is not the result of animal abuse or stress. The bear is well taken care of, as evidenced by it’s pudgy little stomach.

What. The. Hell?


New Zealand is clearly going astray under the leadership of Helen Clarke.

Where else in the world can you get charged with “assault with a hedgehog“?

I C Future Roast Pork!


Pig

Drop Bears


Warning: The rest of this post is quite alarming, so only click for more if you think you’re prepared for it.

Read the rest of this entry »

Japanese Whaling


Japanese whalers have released a video on YouTube describing Australians as ‘racist’, and needless to say, they found the worst possible footage, took it all completely out of context, and added subtitles.

The movie is below. I haven’t watched it all, but I’m working on the assumption that it’s quite disturbing, so watch it at your own discretion.

They have snake parks in South Africa?!?


And apparently really tough chickens.

(h/t The Jungle Trader)

Don’t Let This Happen To You


There was a story of interest in the Herald Sun today (no link), about a drop bear attack. Here’s an extract:

Melissa Kerrin, 15, was on a school camping trip at Mt. Macedon National Park when she encountered one of Australia’s most vicious creatures. The year 10 student, a native of the United States, was attacked by a drop bear (koalus ataqus) while hiking along a bush trail in the National Park.

Drop bears are a common species in Australia, and live mostly in gum and eucalypt trees in the eastern States, and are most prevalent in Tasmania. They look remarkably similar to the koala, although their claws, used for climbing trees and attacking prey, are larger, and they have two large fangs, used to hold their prey while excising flesh with a row of smaller, more jagged fangs behind the two larger ones.

Ms. Kerrin’s guardian and school teacher, Mr. Peter Healey, told this reporter that “We just didn’t know what was happening. First, we were walking, and then suddenly there was a flash of gray, a scream, and it was all over. Mel was on the ground, unconscious, and it wasn’t until the park ranger saw the wounds that we knew what had happened. We had to carefully carry Mel back to the ranger station and call an ambulance.”

According to Mr. Healey, the park ranger, Michael Porter, then organized a search team led by Aboriginal tracker Marjoria Toowombat, to track down the dangerous animal before any other casualties occur. Mr. Porter reportedly then tried some of the traditional bush healing techniques to tend to Ms. Kerrin’s injuries, without success.

Parks Victoria released an official statement early this morning, in which they stated “The ranger at the scene responded to the incident in accordance with the official guidelines, including the use of the animal tracking team. We regret that this incident has occurred, and wish Ms. Kerrin a speedy recovery.”

Ms. Kerrin’s parents are reportedly on their way to Australia to be with their daughter, who is in the Alfred Hospital in a serious condition. She was unable to be reached for comment.

Dangerous little fuckers, those drop bears. Don’t mess with them.

Ouch!

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