Now I understand


I’ve spent years trying to figure out why people fail to understand how governments have been systematically tearing down the foundations of individual liberties. How can they not see it? How can they not understand what is happening?

Now I understand. Completely. Read this, and you will too.

I’m going to lie down now. In the fetal position. And try to find a happy place.

Posted in WTF. Tags: , , . 4 Comments »

Occupy….Frederick?!?!?


I live in a city (and I use the term extremely loosely) named Frederick. Frederick, Maryland, to be exact. Frederick is located 45 miles west of Baltimore, 45 miles northwest of Washington, DC. There are somewhere between 50,000 and 75,000 people who live in greater Frederick/Walkersville/Braddock Heights/New Market. Metropolis it ain’t. In fact, up until the cost of housing in greater Washington pushed suburbia on Frederick, it was considered “the sticks”. Nowheresville. Residents of Frederick are referred to as “Frednecks“. You get the idea.

The Occupy movement, which started with Wall Street, evolved to include many cities in the US, including Los Angeles, Sacramento, Seattle, Cincinnati, Austin, Washington, and others. The main thing these cities have in common is that they are either state capitals or major population centers. And the main thing that Occupy protesters have in common is that they are leftist spoiled kids from the suburbs who think the world owes them a living.

So how do “Frederick, MD” and “Occupy” end up in the same sentence? Behold, Occupy Frederick!

Frederick has officially been occupied.

Members of Occupy Frederick set up tents and hung signs next to Carroll Creek on Market Street on Sunday afternoon in hopes of getting the word out about their Occupy Our Homes foreclosure event in early February.

Fifteen to 20 people braved below-freezing temperatures and trudged through snow in their winter coats, gloves and hats on Sunday, trying to stay warm while building awareness.

Building awareness. How very progressive! [cue puking noises]

I’m rather at a loss trying to figure out how left wing pukes “raising awareness” are going to fare among the Frednecks. Perhaps we Frednecks can raise THEIR awareness. Lessons they could learn include:

“Get a job!”
“Occupy THIS!”
“I got yer 99% RIGHT HERE!”
“Why don’t you ‘occupy’ a bathtub, you filthy hippy maggots!”

And, the one they most need to learn: “We don’t owe you shit!”

Wiener of the Year


It’s time for the least prestigious unknown award currently presented by the denizens of the old WWW – The Vulture’s Wiener of the Year award.

Click here to read on.

That ain’t right


It’s bad enough that Abraham Lincoln is revered in this country, notwithstanding the Constitutional wreckage his presidency left behind. But most Americans – including, until yesterday, me – aren’t aware that another Constitution-wrecker is being given special posthumous honors on an annual basis.


Just learned on @dailyrundown that each yr a military honor guard lays a wreath on Woodrow Wilson’s tomb. Can next R president stop this?


WHA-WHA-WHAT?!?!?!?!? Woodrow effing Wilson?!?!?!?!?

For those of you unfamiliar with the disgrace that was Woodrow Wilson, his presidency was the first real-world implementation of fascism, a full decade before the original Il Duce, Benito Mussolini, coined the term. Wilson employed legislative coercion, media control, and even outright thuggery to achieve his ends. His current address is that dark corner of Hell where despots and tyrants spend their days. This piece of shit gets a military honor guard? Every frickin’ year?

That ain’t right. It just ain’t right.

Self-inflicted wound


And here I was worried that the media, the Team Elephant establishment, and the other GOP candidates were going to take down Ron Paul. It appears he’s pretty good at it himself.


Ron Paul is taking “no comment” to a whole new level.

The Republican presidential candidate walked out on a CNN interview Wednesday following a heated discussion over racist newsletters that were sent out in his name more than two decades ago.

The usually mild-mannered, Texas congressman – who’s leading in some Iowa polls – became irked when network reporter Gloria Borger pressed Paul about the newsletters.

Paul said he was sick of being “pestered” by reporters about the issue.


*face palm*

He can’t seriously believe that he can withstand allegations of racism and bigotry by running away, can he? I admire the guy, to be sure, but even I have issues with the way he handled this.

*sigh* I guess I’d better get used to the term “President Romney” in 2013.

TSSA – coming to a highway near you


I don’t know which is more chilling – the reported news, or the headline.

Tennessee Becomes First State To Fight Terrorism Statewide

You’re probably used to seeing TSA’s signature blue uniforms at the airport, but now agents are hitting the interstates to fight terrorism with Visible Intermodal Prevention and Response (VIPR).

“Where is a terrorist more apt to be found? Not these days on an airplane more likely on the interstate,” said Tennessee Department of Safety & Homeland Security Commissioner Bill Gibbons.

Tuesday Tennessee was first to deploy VIPR simultaneously at five weigh stations and two bus stations across the state.

Anyone harboring any illusion that 21st century American media is anything other than the propaganda organs of Big Government is delusional.

But enough criticism of the lapdog media’s fawning. What we have here is the dreaded “next step” in the so-called War on Terror.

Our rulers have moved beyond herding us about at airports. Now they want to slowly get us used to being spot searched on our highways. They start small, with truck inspections at weigh stations. And before you can say, “WTF! Fourth Amendment violation!”, it’ll be random traffic stops of ordinary folks in passenger vehicles.

As if another reason to hate the failed War on Drugs is needed, the power for state police to stop a motorist on the most minimal (or invented) probable cause is already in place, courtesy of “law and order” judges ruling in favor of police in the majority of random stop cases to “stem the flow of drugs”. I suppose our rulers figure that since the War on Drugs has been such a phenomenal success [/sarcasm], they might as well extend those benefits to the far more successful War on Terror personal freedoms.

Like the proverbial frog in a pot of water that is slowly brought to a boil, we sit in bovine stupor as our freedoms are stripped from us. As long as we have American Idol, Dancing with the Stars, and tons of televised sports, we’re content to pretend that we live in the “freest nation on Earth”.

But pretending doesn’t make it so.

Governor Moonbeam strikes again


Governor Jerry Brown of Kahleefornia must have felt that he hadn’t left enough wreckage his first stint as Governer (1975-1983), during which he earned the moniker “Governor Moonbeam” as a result of his wacky libtard ways. Apparently he learned absolutely nothing in the ensuing 28 years, because he’s still finding new and inventive ways to ruin the Golden State. Ladies and gentlemen: how NOT to generate tax revenues.


Amazon.com today said it will sever ties with some 10,000 affiliates in California to protest the Internet sales-tax law signed by Gov. Jerry Brown Wednesday.

The big online retailer has been threatening to cut those ties since February. In emails today to its California affiliates, Amazon called the bill “unconstitutional and counterproductive. ” The bill is part of the budget package passed by the Legislature.

The affiliates are businesses and nonprofits that have Amazon links on their websites. When someone clicks through that link and buys something from Amazon, the affiliate gets a fee.

Under the bill, Amazon will have to collect sales tax on all sales to Californians.


People like Governor Moonbeam are not called libtards for nothing. Brown knew that Amazon was going to do this because…wait for it…they’ve been telling him so since February. And yet he STILL signed the bill into law! I wonder how many jobs (and the tax revenues they provide) will be lost as a result of this ass-headed attempt to put a gun to Amazon’s head and extort tribute from them.

Asshat.

Weiner Pulls Out


It’s the end of an error. Weiner’s out.


Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-N.Y.) will resign from his seat in Congress, heeding calls from President Barack Obama, House Speaker John Boehner (R-Ohio), House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) and dozens of other congressional Democrats, sources confirm to POLITICO. The resignation ends nearly three weeks of tumultuous political controversy since the New York congressman sent a lewd picture of himself over Twitter which he claimed at first was a result of a hack, and later admitted he had sent himself.

Weiner is expected to make his resignation official in a statement to the press at a senior center in Brooklyn at 2 pm.


Weiner pulled out at senior center? Think of the poor old women!

The schadenfreude has been beyond blissful. A creepy libtard is caught flashing his namesake. Caught lying about it. Accused of asking a former prØn star to lie for him.

There’s the name. The jokes. The throngs laughing in his face.

Good bye, Weiner. At Tizona, we prefer Bush.

Congressman(‘s) Weiner


Weiner awardSome guys just never learn. Sean Salisbury. Brett Favre. And now aptly-named Congress-critter Anthony “wanna see my” Weiner.


Our debt ceiling is yet to be raised as the healthcare debate looms large, yet the most important political news of the moment revolves around a Brooklyn representative’s penis.


As Weiner himself noted, “The jokes write themselves.”

I thought Weiner was a little stiff at his news converence.

What’s the difference between a Democrat and a Republican? About 6 inches.

An inch more he’d be a king; an inch less he’d be a queen.

The police investigated whether a penis picture was displayed. The case was thrown out due to lack of evidence.

(Insert the “wiener” joke of your choice here)

More climate chicanery


A dog bites man headline – “NASA Gets Caught Faking Climate Change Data-AGAIN!” (Hat tip to Vulture pal Stacy Allgood for the tip).


The climate change hoaxers use computer models to predict that sea levels would rise anywhere from 15 inches to 2o feet because of global warming in the 21st century (the consensus number is closer to 3 feet).

But Mother Nature was never good at computer science. Satellite data proved that the first decade of the 21st century sea level grew by only 0.83 inches (a pace of just 8 inches for the entire century). What’s even worse (for the global warming hoaxers) there has been no rise since 2006. Now I know that some Democrats believe that Obama is a miracle worker, but even the the crazies at the Daily Kos would admit that controlling sea level is way above his pay grade. So the scientists at the University of Colorado’s NASA-funded Sea Level Research Group did what any other self-respecting cult members would do, they fudged the numbers. They simply added .3 millimeters per year to its Global Mean Sea Level Time Series. That way they could report that the sea level rise was accelerating, instead of what was actually happening–decelerating.


Yeah…this data is no good. We’ll have to “fix it”.

And “fix it” they do. But what they mean by “fix” and what I mean by “fix” are two different things entirely.

Trust me when I say, “The fix is in”.

Naughty Jihadi!


According to this report, Usama bin Laden (or someone in his posse) was waging Jihad against the little infidel in his pants.


A stash of pornography was found in the hideout of Osama bin Laden by the U.S. commandos who killed him, current and former U.S. officials said on Friday.

The pornography recovered in bin Laden’s compound in Abbottabad, Pakistan, consists of modern, electronically recorded video and is fairly extensive, according to the officials, who discussed the discovery with Reuters on condition of anonymity.

The officials said they were not yet sure precisely where in the compound the pornography was discovered or who had been viewing it. Specifically, the officials said they did not know if bin Laden himself had acquired or viewed the materials.


I’m not sayin’…I’m just sayin’.

Posted in Funny, WTF. Tags: , . 13 Comments »

And it begins…


(Cross-posted from The Vulture Lurks)

You knew it was coming. After all, you can’t just kill Usama bin Laden and declare victory. Oh no. You have to milk the sumbitch for all it’s worth. Welcome to 2001, the sequel.

An advisory has been sent to law enforcement officials advising them to be vigilant about train security based on information uncovered after the death of Osama bin Laden, officials said.

Officials stressed the advisory is general in nature and the information apparently uncovered from the bin Laden compound dates back more than a year.

According to NBC News, U.S. officials say they have not found reference to specific plots. Instead, they say they’ve found what they call “aspirational” items — events al-Qaida operatives were interested in trying to make happen.

I see. So…we’re in a heightened state of alert and expected to endure God-knows-what in the name of “security” based on…al-Qaida’s wishlist????

*bangs head on wall*

Introduction


The VultureWho is this Vulture?

Please allow me to introduce myself. I’m a man of we–

Okay, “Sympathy for the Vulture” is NOT a good start. Let’s try again.

I discovered Tizona shortly after I discovered Andrew Bolt. I liked it. A lot. I considered it a ‘must read’ for my daily intake of blogs and news sources. While I don’t always agree with everything the individual contributors write, I certainly consider their viewpoints to be well-reasoned…unlike those expressed by Global Warming True Believers, Il Duce (Obama) sycophants, faux conservatives, and other douche bags.

Some time back bingbing asked me if I would be interested in being a contributor to The Tizona Group. I thought about it for about .3 seconds before responding that, yes, I would LOVE to. For various reasons it took a while to get me set up as a contributor. But now it’s on.

Those of you who have read my blog, The Vulture Lurks, know that I am a libertarian (small ‘l’), a Global Warming unbeliever, a hater of police and prosecutorial misconduct, and no fan of Il Duce (so named because, contrary to what others say about him being a Marxist, he governs as a Corporatist, in the style of the original Il Duce, Benito Mussolini).

I hail from Frederick, MD, a bedroom suburb equidistant from Washington DC and Baltimore. I have a lovely wife, Deadeye (so named because of her proficiency with firearms); two sons, ages 24 and 22; and I work as a computer programmer (official title, for what it’s worth: Principal Consultant).

I claim to be a “Health food” expert and a “Pain Management” expert, though a quick glance at those two posts will reveal that I’m nothing of the kind – just a coffee addict with a potty mouth.

I probably won’t post often. That day job thingy cramps my style. But I’ll contribute when I can and I’ll do so happy to have the opportunity to be part of this little community.

Homo oecologicus


They’re dead serious (I think), but that didn’t stop me from laughing at every sentence. You couldn’t satirise gobbledegook this well.

Even by academic humanities standards, it’s a painful abuse of the English language.

Quote of the Day


.

“Australia is not an island.”

-Australian Prime Minister Kevin Rudd speaking to The 7:30 Report’s Kerry O’Brien, 28/08/08

.

UPDATE: Angus Dei provides some appropriate musical advice for Kevni

UPDATE 2: More accurate map of Australia here.

http://tizona.wordpress.com/2009/04/29/australia-not-just-an-island-but-a-hella-scary-one-too/

.

Quote Of The Day


“I’m not sure we need to worry too much about the Golden Gate Bridge [in the event of an earthquake], because I’m not sure all of Western California will still be around.”

I heard this on an ad for a documentary looking at what’s being done to the Golden Gate Bridge for the inevitable earthquake.

Silly internet things I never tire of.


This is one.

A Gift For The Mole


Songs From Squirreldom (NSFW).

Enjoy!

I’ve Found A Secret!


Pssst, guys?

I’ve found the Super Sekret Source for the dribble written here.

Click at your own peril

If I disappear during the night, El Cid can have my jar of vegemite.

Posted in WTF. Tags: . 9 Comments »

Absolut Texas


In An Absolut World,Texas would still be a republic, and would include half of New Mexico, the panhandle of Oklahoma, 1/3 of Colorado, and part of Wyoming.

Of course, Absolut said they were sorry. No apology necessary: The Muslims will own Sweden soon enough.

And to think, I have to teach these kids


WTF?!: You Aussies are Going to Have to Interpret THIS for Me


My Boomerang Won’t Come Back:

I thought us Americans had the market cornered on the ridiculous.

Via Derb.

I have to admit, I don’t get it.

Obama The Messiah?


This website may or may not answer your questions.

Or it may just scare you!

All I asked for was an explanation


Got myself into a very heated argument with a young British Muslim woman on Thursday night. It all started when I politely asked her to explain the following. So why didn’t she explain it satisfactorily and instead, attack me personally? The following is commonly known as the Verse of the Sword. It appears late in the Koran and, thus abrogates earlier peaceful injunctions.

9:5. Then when the Sacred Months (the 1st, 7th, 11th, and 12th months of the Islamic calendar) have passed, then kill the Mushrikun {unbelievers} wherever you find them, and capture them and besiege them, and prepare for them each and every ambush. But if they repent and perform As-Salat (Iqamat-as-Salat {the Islamic ritual prayers}), and give Zakat {alms}, then leave their way free. Verily, Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

With thanks to http://www.jihadwatch.org

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