To Our Readers: We are Dealing with Very Sad News here at Tizona

One of the best friends Tizona has, the kind and gentle lady – yet, tough as nails – known as Saltydog, has been diagnosed with cancer that is not survivable.

“I have been hospitalized, finally, for the last 11 days. They discovered metastatic cancer which has affected, among other places, my spine and other bones, my lymph nodes, my brain, my R. lung, and other organs and places. In other words, my time is limited. I don’t know, and neither do the doctors, how long.”

From what we know of her, I can assure you that maudlin sentiment is not what she desires. She has lived life fully and boldly, and will face the end of it with all of her grace and dignity.

“They are controlling my pain well and I’m finally able to function, though extremely slowly and with difficulty, but I’m doing it!”

“And that is an important point I want to make to my friends. I have no more control over my death than anyone else does, but I’m perfectly capable of controlling how I choose to live, just as I’ve always done.”

“My mental and intellectual attitudes are very good. There are many, many things to be happy about and I am so–to the point of finding myself smiling at the most incongruous times. The support
and care I am getting from family, friends, professionals, and others is beyond belief, and brings a full understanding to Lou Gehrig’s statement that “I consider myself the luckiest man on the face of the

“I hope this helps my friends here. When there is nothing to do, one must accept those things we cannot change.”

Please bear with us, as things will not be the same around here… well, ever, but please post your well wishes to a great and brave lady.

I wish to add…one of the sharpest retorts to a commenter, at Jules Crittenden’s that I will never forget, from the one and only Saltydog.

Most excellently composed by Angus Dei…Thank you.

“With my red hair and green eyes, I would have made you weep”

Saltydog…I’m enjoying a fine brandy…smoking a fine cigar…Here’s looking at you kid.

Ummm, Salty…you ain’t being removed as an Editor…forget that crap.

Danica Patrick Makes IndyCar History: Wins Japan 300

As regular readers know, The Beef of God is a Danica Patrick fan. No wonder why, really.

Danica Patrick 016

Well, the world’s fastest hot babe has now made Indycar history by winning the Japan 300. She is the first woman to accomplish this feat, and she’s only twenty-six years old.

“MOTEGI, Japan (AP) – Danica Patrick became the first female winner in IndyCar history Sunday, taking the Indy Japan 300 after the top contenders were forced to pit for fuel in the final laps.
Patrick finished 5.8594 seconds ahead of pole-sitter Helio Castroneves on the 1.5-mile Twin Ring Motegi oval after leader Scott Dixon pitted with five laps left and Dan Wheldon and Tony Kanaan came in a lap later.

“It’s a long time coming. Finally,” Patrick said. “It was a fuel strategy race, but my team called it perfectly for me. I knew I was on the same strategy as Helio and when I passed him for the lead, I couldn’t believe it. This is fabulous.”

The 26-year-old Patrick won in her 50th career IndyCar start, taking the lead from Castroneves on the 198th lap in the 200-lap race.

“I think Danica is such a fantastic person and I’m thrilled for her that the monkey is finally off of her back,” said Michael Andretti, co-owner of Andretti Green Racing. “We have all believed in her and she proved today that she is a winner. Frankly, I think this is the first of many.””

I love fast women.

UPDATE: Bruce Martin has posed an excellent article at Sports Illustrated on the deep, deep significance of this win, coming as it does on Danica’s 50th race, and at the point that IndyCar racing has been reunified for the first time in decades. Very well done, to both Danica and Bruce.

Posted in Cars, Sport. 4 Comments »


Yeah, well. It just needed sayin’, is all.

1.618: Another Beautiful Mountain View

Kevin’s all-singin’ all-dancin’ goat rodeo: the 2020 roundup

Well, Kevin’s all-singin’ all-dancin’ goat rodeo has finally drawn to a close, and what a circus it’s been!

Andrew Bolt deserves some kind of commendation for going above & beyond the call of duty and spending the weekend actually watching this shitefest and live-blogging it for us from woe to go. Another commendation goes to Tim Blair for his comprehensive round-up. But the Grand Prize must go to both sets of readers/commenters, who filled the pages of all three posts with scads of side-splitting, eye-watering pants-p!ssing observations – at this point, near on a thousand comments all up.

(UPDATE: Well over a thousand comments now. And another excellent morning-after round-up by Andrew Bolt, plus a discussion of the Official 2020 Goat Rodeo Summit Theme Song.)

Read ’em and weep, campers.


UPDATE: “Everybody was standing around a sheet of, you guessed it, butchers’ paper when the PM entered and took a seat – on the floor. Kooky.
According to the PM, he ‘just felt like sitting down’.” -via Annabel Crabb’s summit live-blog

Yet another update, via Bill Leak:

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