To cap it off

That cap.

It's the mobile phone camera, not your eyes.

Well, what a year.

I’d just like to wish everyone out there a very happy, safe, prosperous and healthy new year.

Time to start the party. And what better song to start it with?

And the alternative version for the coolios out there.

Posted in Temp. 1 Comment »

What am I?

A bucket of CO2 for the correct answer to this one…




The answer is scarier than you think….

Posted in Temp. 21 Comments »

Seats! Seats! Seats! Order Now!

Everyone’s getting in on the seat-selling business these days.

More seats for sale in Chicago

More seats for sale in Chicago

Looks like a good deal, but (as usual!) Paco goes them one better.

-via Gateway Pundit & Paco


“What is it?”, Bingbing asks?   Dude!


UPDATE: In comments below, thefrollickingmole reminds us of some Great Vibes in History:

Adolf:  “Ein Reich Ein Volk, Ein Vibe dude”

Winston:  “We shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall vibe on the beaches, we shall vibe on the landing grounds, we shall vibe in the fields and in the streets, we shall vibe in the hills; we shall never surrender.”

Alexander the Great:  “How great are the dangers I face to win a good vibe in Athens.”

Neville Chamberlain:  “I believe it is vibe for our time… vibe with honour.”

Julius Caesar:   “I came, I saw, I vibed.” [ed:  would that be Veni, Vidi, Vibi?]

William Shakespeare :  “Some are born vibed, some achieve vibration, and some have vibing thrust upon them.”

Joseph Stalin:  “The Pope? How many vibes has he got?”

Barack Obama:  “Vibe will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the vibe that we seek.”

Actually that last one almost fits…..

Thought Of The Day

Man-Made Global Warming Causes … Earthquakes?

In a recent post, Tim Blair offers the following challenge:

UPDATE II. A warmy suggests:

There should be a prize for the denialist who “proves” global warming doesn’t exist by pointing to the lamest, most short-term, most localised cooler than normal weather event.

Let’s flip that around and offer a prize for someone pointing to a localised, short-term – and historically predictable – weather event as evidence of warming. Hurricane Katrina, for example.

This is not quite the “Today is hot in Humpty Doo – it’s  Global Warming and we’re all! gonna! die!!” observation he might have been looking for, but if nothing else it’s worthy of a Long Bow prize.  I offer the following AP article in today’s  The Australian in full  (emphasis mine): Read the rest of this entry »

I can’t sleep

I just keep laughing my guts out.

It’s the vibe.


UPDATE by spot_the_dog:   If you thought you couldn’t sleep last night, mate…

Posted in Temp. 8 Comments »

The debate of the century

Yep, that one.

H/T Rafe Champion.

Messiah Worshipped

As I was purchasing the new Metallica album today, something caught my eye, and I had to pick it up and examine it further.

It was this DVD:

His Story

Barack Obama: His Story

For $18, I figured I may as well. $14.20 later (apparently it was discounted further. Bargain basement Messiah! Messiah for all!) and I now have a new DVD to watch. It was the blurb that made me did it.

Read the rest of this entry »

What is it?

It’s da viiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiibe.

Gettin’ hip and down wit da vibe.

It’s gotta be da vibe.



UPDATE by spot_the_dog:   “What is it?”, Bingbing asks?  DUDE!

Stupidest News Story I’ve Read Today

This is news?!

Posted in WTF. 8 Comments »

Just how dumb is KRUDD?? UPDATED


Well hes quick to give his answer isnt he, fucking dumb….,25197,24863942-601,00.html

Yes Australias biggest clown wants you to live near a “protected” POS whos own country thinks they are too radical for them. I hope they arent going to have their identities hidden when they inevitably revert to form.


The smarmy waxgobbler is said to be considering allowing some of the scum from Guantanamo bay  to settle in Australia. I cant see Kevvie passing by the chance to polish his “man of action” credentials at the cost of Australian citizens.

Ps: that site is a thinly disguised Islamic front as I will show below.
“Australia, along with a number of other countries, has been approached to consider resettling detainees from Guantánamo Bay,” a spokesman for Prime Minister Kevin Rudd told the newspaper, The Weekend Australian. Read the rest of this entry »

Launching My New Conspiracy Theory

I don’t usually engage in conspiracy theories (Troofers, anyone?) but this one is different. My Conspiracy, hereby known as The Drinks Scam Conspiracy, is so ridiculous that if anyone believes it, I will laugh my ass off and mock them for as long as I live.

The Drinks Scam Conspiracy is based on a simple premise: some people will buy absolutely anything. So allow me to now detail the Conspiracy for you.

We all know that Global Warming/Climate Change is real and must be fought immediately, and therefore, for a reason that makes absolutely no sense, we have to get rid of the carbon.

Many alcohols are filtered through carbon to remove impurities and unwanted flavours and other assorted things, so it naturally follows that we need to remove the carbon from the alcohol brewing process. Our superiors (ie, Those Who Believe) therefore believe that in order to fight Global Warming, we need to have either beer that tastes like piss, or go without a wide range of drinks, because from memory, beer, wine, vodka, bourbon and Southern Comfort are all carbon-filtered.

This got me thinking about Dear Leader Kevin’s alcopops tax. Since Dear Leader’s alcopops tax was introduced to “curb teenage binge drinking”, we can safely assume that this tax is for the good of the children, and that alcohol is always bad. So it naturally follows that since alcohol is bad, alcohol that is carbon filtered is extra bad. So we’re taught about the evils of carbon, starting as early as the age of five.

We’re through the looking glass here people…

Global Warming was invented to curb drinking!

The most evil key… ever

D Minor.

But of course.

BTW, what kind of name for a song is ‘Toccata & Fugue’?

Who the hell would use that for a name?

Why do I feel rude when pronouncing ‘fugue’?

Shamelessly link-whored from a Texan monk.


I don’t know what it is, maybe you musos can sort it out,  but that sounds eerily similar to this.

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Greetings from The Alamo City

Well, I have 2 of 3 moving trips out of the way, I obviously have myself reconnected to the intertubes, got a new washer, dryer, and fridge/freezer… and life is pretty damned cool. It’ll be a couple of hours before the beer in the fridge is cool though, and a few hours more before I have ice to mix drinks (Is there anything else ice is good for?).

It’s 68 degrees and windy… in San Antonio Texas… and my back is killing me! LOL!

Of Speedofart and Penisland…

Theo Spark has collected some interesting URLs from organisations that didn’t think their addresses through very well:

Once you’ve had a go at guessing, visit Theo to find out the core business of each of the above.

What’s bigger than the great global warming swindle?


WHEN Brisbane lawyer Elizabeth Nosworthy was handed the chair of ailing financial engineering group Babcock & Brown as it teetered under $50 billion of group debt in August this year, eyes were rubbed in disbelief.

Surely not.

Nosworthy is a member of what many in business circles are now calling the “unflushables” _ non-executive directors who, thanks to Australia’s boardroom club, keep bobbing up.

This is despite being involved in corporate failures, share market collapses and value destruction that runs into the billions.

How can that kind of stuff be going on? What a year. Remember those hedge fund managers? Yeah. The ‘alpha’ guys. Big reason why we’re in this mess now. Remember the Community Reinvestment Act? Ha! You know, that stupid law which precipitated the US  housing crisis, which precipitated the global economic crisis we’re all in now? Another HUGE reason why we’re in this mess now. Reinvestment of tax dollars indeed. This bailout has to be Bush’s worst mistake.

What a year. The average Joe has been robbed blind. And all in broad daylight.

Cartoon via Liberty News.

Curse You, Global Warming! 2008 “Point & Laugh” Round-Up

Global warming was blamed for everything from beasts gone wild to anorexic whales to the complete breakdown of human society this year — showing that no matter what it is and where it happens, scientists, explorers, politicians and those who track the Loch Ness Monster are comfortable scapegoating the weather.

Below the fold, takes a look back at 10 things that global warming allegedly caused — or will no doubt soon be responsible for — as reported in the news around the world in 2008. Read the rest of this entry »

Western Australia: Even our dolphins are hella smart!

As noted by Medical News TodayCosmos, Discover magazine, ABC Science, New Scientist, National Geographic and Georgetown University (among others),  West Australian dolphins in Shark Bay are among the only marine mammals in the world known to use tools, and dolphins in Shark Bay that use sponges  spent more time using tools than any species except humans.


‘It turns out the brainiacs of the marine world can also be tool-using workaholics, spending more time hunting with tools than any non-human animal.’ — Janet Mann, professor of biology and psychology, who has been studying the Shark Bay dolphin population for more than 21 years.

So Western Australia has both the smartest and the hardest-working marine mammals in the world?  Not surprised.  We are, after all, the Conservative stronghold of Australia, specialising in both smarts & hard work 😉

–thanks to nephew B in NC

Perth’s Best Tacky Christmas Display

Imagine 40,000 twinkling fairy lights painstakingly synchronised to what may well  be the most excruciating “music on hold” tune in the world (you can tune in to the soundtrack on your car radio as you drive past – this is just one of the synchronised lights & music combos)…

Read the rest of this entry »

From Here, It’s All Downhill

I love Batman, he’s the greatest Superhero to ever grace this earth, and even Gotham City.

So how did I react at being given a pair of bat earrings for Christmas?


All at several decibels above safe sound…

Merry Christmas

We’re early, but the Tizona Group are enthusiastic about wishing all our readers, contributors, editors and friends an absolutely fantastic Christmas for 2008, and many more to come.

We’re sure that all our friends have been good enough to get presents from Santa! (…except maybe that Ash character…)

Merry Christmas everyone!

And a happy and healthy New Year!

Tracking Santa

As most people here know, NORAD has been tracking Santa for many years now.  Click  here to see an important exclusive interview with where Santa Claus, the Department of Transportation and the Air Force announce a Christmas alliance.  Then, see below for a clip from last year’s NORAD Santa-Track program.

Here are some resources to help you track Santa this year, courtesy of NORAD:

NORAD Tracks Santa – Home Page

Countdown to Track Santa

Track Santa in 3D (In addition to tracking Santa on the NORAD Tracks Santa homepage, you can also track his flight in Google Earth)

Track Santa on your mobile (cell) phone!

Santa Cams are ultra-cool, high-tech, high-speed digital cameras pre-positioned at many locations around the world only on Christmas Eve. The cameras capture images and videos of Santa and his reindeer as they make their journey around the world.  Visit to this page on Christmas Eve to see Santa fly!

And yes,  NASA is helping out too:  NASA’s KSC Providing Assistance to Santa on Christmas Eve”

WARNING! – While you can watch Santa Claus as he starts his journey, you must be tucked up warm and asleep in your bed, otherwise he can’t leave any presents behind for you to unwrap the next morning.

Now heres a moral hole with no bottom

Probe into Beverly Hills cosmetic surgeon ‘who turned human fat from liposuctions into biodiesel for his 4×4’

More proof of Blairs law. All the stupidities of the world are combining into one big dense mass of stupidium. At some stage it must reach critical mass …


Bittner wrote on his website: ‘The vast majority of my patients request that I use their fat for fuel — and I have more fat than I can use.

‘Not only do they get to lose their love handles or chubby belly, but they get to take part in saving the Earth.’

Why does this remind me of the old “hitchikers guide to the galaxy” segment where a tropical paradice planet ensures it doesnt lose anything by amputating bits of customers who gain weight…

U.S. business magazine Forbes reported that Dr Bittner used the ‘lipofuel’ to power both his Ford Explorer car and his girlfriend’s Lincoln Navigator.

So by rendering bits of people down into fuel, the good doctor can claim to be an environmetalist? Im trying so hard not to in voke a sever case of Godwins it hurts.

Heres the link to the full story.×4.html

So Im not fat, Im just keeping an emergency supply of fuel for when petrol hits $2.00 a litre again…

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Aussie Researcher: “They like watching HD-TV, but they don’t have any personality.”

Who’da thunk?

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