Now that we’ve all had our fun with PETA’s “Sea Kittens” both here and at Blair’s, I thought I’d throw a quick post together memorialising some of the best captions from Tim Blair readers for the photo below, featured in Tim’s post
There are even more good comments on the site – go see for yourself. But of course, no Tim Blair post would be complete without at least one humourless self-righteous Lefty huffing and puffing about the evil heartless racist flying-monkey RWDBs who mindlessly respond to Blair’s “Dogwhistle of Racism,” so preach it, Brother Toaf!
Dunno, Comrade – I for one think we don’t hear nearly enough “racist jokes about bestiality” these days. But then, I’m not a self-professed “pinko-commo terrorist-lover,” so what would I know?
The Tizona Group 
January 12, 2009, 1:12 pm at 1:12 pm
[…] See the original post here: Tunnel Kittens of Gaza […]
January 12, 2009, 1:44 pm at 1:44 pm
spot_the_dog
Thanks for posting. I thought the comments were hilarious and very creative 🙂
January 12, 2009, 2:05 pm at 2:05 pm
“My name is spot_the_dog and it’s been 12 days since my last post…” Sorry I’ve been kinda MIA lately guys; I just haven’t been online that much lately. I will try to do better now!
And yes, Gramfan – every now and then Tim has one of those posts where you just know the commenters are going to strike gold!
And hasn’t his comment count gone up lately – wow! I wonder whether it’s because more people have more time on their hands this time of year, plus they’re getting used to the new format, or whether it’s because Bolt’s away? Or probably a combination of those. I hope he keeps it up – the old (unmoderated) format used to move so fast and get so many comments and back-and-forth going, maybe his new format is starting to pick up like that too.
January 12, 2009, 2:13 pm at 2:13 pm
GO ISRAEL, DESTROY HAMAS! (Repeat)
That’s my chant. Any questions?
January 12, 2009, 2:28 pm at 2:28 pm
As opposed to non-racist (religionist? [but let’s call a spade a spade…] anti-terrorist) jokes about bestiality? Is this another one of those baa baa black sheep conundrums?
Mary had a little lamb, it’s fleece as white as snow.
Snow is racist.
January 12, 2009, 2:36 pm at 2:36 pm
Speciest?
That’s it!
YOU, Spot the dog, are speciest! You speciest, you!!
January 12, 2009, 2:57 pm at 2:57 pm
Actually, Bingbing, Peter Singer — darling of the oh-so-‘progressive’ Left — says that our prudish Western prejudice against bestiality is just that… speciesism .
Ewwwwwww….
January 12, 2009, 3:01 pm at 3:01 pm
What’s he trying to justify there?
Eeeeek!
January 12, 2009, 3:41 pm at 3:41 pm
Did you see this post at the hard-hitting site “Blair/Bolt Watch,” condemning us “Food shortage gigglers”?
No. sense. of. humour. NONE.
January 12, 2009, 3:54 pm at 3:54 pm
spot_the_dog
I guess I would spend more time on Bolt than Blair, so I am a Bolt “refugee” ATM.
Then again, it’s hard to keep up with Bolt sometimes.
In a way I am glad he is away right now. I bet some of the comments on the Israel – Gaza war would have gone to 8 pages.
But this from Blair is pure gold. It’s always nice to see a bit of humour during tough times and there’s plenty of awful stories out there right now.
January 12, 2009, 4:13 pm at 4:13 pm
Singer is a downright freak. No wonder JULIEN worships the ground he walks on.
January 12, 2009, 4:41 pm at 4:41 pm
Classic isn’t it? Here we are rightly mocking what should be mocked but nah, some Vibe Dingbat has actually gone and pondered it seriously.
Poor Daisy.
January 12, 2009, 4:52 pm at 4:52 pm
And as for Toaf et al., wonder what their position is on Israel having been attacked every single day since that nation’s inception.
How many rockets were fired into Israel just last year by Palestinians?
Santimonious do-gooders.
January 12, 2009, 9:05 pm at 9:05 pm
I just wish all you H8trs out there would realise the potential of this photo. “Gaza, a love story” could be HUGE on broadway. My agent has already spoken to some backers (the BAKO, PCAO corporation or something) and they think this could make millions.
Think of it; “Their love was forbidden, but Achmed and Fatima knew that one day, they would be together” Damn, I’m gonna be a rich, rich man from this. You watch. 🙂
I’m hoping to get Matt Damon on line as Achmed, Jack Nicholson as his devious uncle Hamad, and there’s some character actor (now this is a twist) called “Stoop Davy Dave” to play Fatima, the young goat who just wants love.
Look past the politics people, and see the money!
January 12, 2009, 9:28 pm at 9:28 pm
LOL 185600, has anyone told Dave (or whatever he calls himself these days) about your plans?
” there is no rational reason to deplore sexual relations between human beings and non-human animals”
Yes, yes there is. You fucking wierdo.
January 12, 2009, 9:36 pm at 9:36 pm
WOZ,
Well, David Hicks says he can’t do it, because it might clash with his book deal or somesuch…….
Mr Davy Dave doesn’t um……know in technical terms what’s involved, but my backers from the Proper Acting Commission Organisation swear that he’ll do the nude scenes and the graphic stuff no sweat.
If David Singer says it’s Ok, then come on. I mean, anyone shagging him must think “dammit, I’m doing Kermit!”
And I’m saying that as an ugly, ugly man. 🙂
January 12, 2009, 9:38 pm at 9:38 pm
Maybe Baz could direct it. That’d bring the troof out.
January 12, 2009, 9:44 pm at 9:44 pm
I was thinking of Baz, but he wanted Fatima to be part of the
Stolen Herd, or some crap, and I really want this to be about the love story. Not politics. A man, His Goat, Forbidden Love.
Damn, that is soooo going on the posters for this.
No, I will direct, using my pornstar name, ‘Pedro Archer’.
January 12, 2009, 10:00 pm at 10:00 pm
I see a need for a revivial of “Springtime For Hitler”, updated with Hamas and their ilk.
(apologies to Mel Brookes).
We just need to think of a better and more appropriate name.
“Springtime for Osama” just doesn’t quite cut it.
“Springtime for the Supreme Simian”?
Would Imanutjob like it? Who cares?
Any genii out there?
*throwing down the gauntlet*.
January 12, 2009, 10:00 pm at 10:00 pm
Can’t top that. It would only be fitting that Village Roadshow distribute it.
January 12, 2009, 10:09 pm at 10:09 pm
Gramfan,
I have it!
“Fatwah for Faisal” The true story of one man’s love for Jihad.
It’s about a young man who wants to be a martyr, and gains a scholarship to the highly acclaimed SBAG (Suicide Bomber Academy Gaza) but they won’t let him practice. But being so committed, we all know it won’t stop our boy………….
Unfortunately, it’s only five minutes long.
The screenplay might need a little work. 🙂
January 12, 2009, 10:28 pm at 10:28 pm
Its all in the build up 186; you need to explain the back story, why such a caring young man wants to blow himself and his life partner/goat into smithereens.
Should be able to get a good 10 minutes out of that.
Either way, in this day and age, I’d guarantee you can get it taxpayer funded…
January 12, 2009, 10:36 pm at 10:36 pm
WOZ,
Taxpayer funding? Top idea! Reckon I can get a lesbian or a druggie or single mum into the story somewhere. But the backstory?
Easy Peasy. An Evil JOO stole his land and forced Fatima the Goat’s family off their favourite grazing lands, all because of a couple of harmless wars aimed at exterminating the JOOs. Piece of piss mate. I tell you, the musical is going to be huge, I can see it now, “I am the Goat of The Tunnel’ is going to make Lloyd Webber weep that he didn’t think of it. 🙂
January 12, 2009, 11:01 pm at 11:01 pm
Reckon you could steal Skye of Sydney’s idea for your musical, 185600:
“So this guy with a veil is really transgender but nobody understands but his pet sheep/goat.”
ARTS GRANT!!!!!
January 12, 2009, 11:05 pm at 11:05 pm
Is there any, any way a CNN crew can be incorporated into the production?
For realism, of course.
He may be an old boy of the same school, but is there even an off chance Michael Ware can be part of the shoot?
January 12, 2009, 11:12 pm at 11:12 pm
If 186 does it on location, he’ll have the whole Pallywood Industry at his disposal, Bingbing – that means Reuters, CNN, ABC, the lot!
Oh, and Jihad Jack Murtha. I’d love to see how 186 would cast Jihad Jack Murtha.
January 12, 2009, 11:22 pm at 11:22 pm
BTW, I want to be credited as a producer and also want a cut of the grosses.
Aint nothing free no more, not even a good idea.
Wait one, aint you already tax payer funded 186? Make that Executive Producer…
January 12, 2009, 11:22 pm at 11:22 pm
Spot,
That’s it! I never thought of the transgender angle before but It’s perfect!
Actually, Ware is already on board Bing, he just doesn’t know it’s not a real scene in Gaza. I doubt he’ll care. If it suits his agenda, it’s fine. Just mention JOOs and he’s cool with it.
I want you all to know that any Arts Grant I get will be spent responsibly, on hats or something. Or getting Lara Bingle to take the top off (she’s going to play um, er, Evil JOO chick, or something).
Michael Clarke is so gonna smash the crap outa me with a Grey Nick, isn’t he?
I don’t care, this meaningful story needs to be told.
I will personally screentest Miss Bingle anytime my wife isn’t around, to confirm her ‘rightness’ for the role. Sorry Bing, you and WOZ get Stoop Davy Dave. Make sure he has the correct number of nipples and stuff, OK? 🙂
January 12, 2009, 11:28 pm at 11:28 pm
“Sorry Bing, you and WOZ get Stoop Davy Dave. Make sure he has the correct number of nipples and stuff, OK? :)”
Now thats just not cricket.
Bing, you can have this one mate. I dont even want to watch.
January 12, 2009, 11:45 pm at 11:45 pm
Fucking Ok! This is going too far!
Spot, Mr Murtha is already in the script, if you supplied money you could read it you know? He’s the caring soulful POTUS, worried that he might have to blame some bloodthirsty US Marines for murder, even though they were all on leave in Kentucky, watching some horse race or something, and bitterly divided within himself about his choices, ‘support HAMAS or Fatah?’ The internal conflict is tearing the poor man apart. The good thing is, he doesn’t have to act.
WOZ,
As executive producer, I can’t promise more money (Bing’s blown it all on smack for the screenwriters) but I can get you a seat on Kevin Rudds 2010 conference, next to somebody Kev thinks is important? Those tickets don’t come cheap, you might be discussing ‘Aloe Vera Watch’ or some such.
If you won’t come to the party on that, if Lara does show me the naughties, I’ll get you some bootleg photos.
Godamn, it’s like filming ‘Apocolypse Now’ around here. Now wonder Spielberg or whoever went nuts. 🙂
January 12, 2009, 11:54 pm at 11:54 pm
Bugger, I was planning on ‘discussing crack’ with Ms Bingle…
January 13, 2009, 12:01 am at 12:01 am
Speaking of “Star-Sucker” Kev, if you manage to fit Cate Blanchett in there somewhere he’ll probably stump up 40% funding!
By the way, it would be really really tragic if Murtha came to a bad end in all this, wouldn’t it 😉
And on that note, I have to take off now – catch y’all later!
January 13, 2009, 12:09 am at 12:09 am
WOZ,
The only person discussing “crack” with Ms Bingle will be my good self (when the wife isn’t around). Please don’t let the ‘Executive Producer’ thing go to your head.
Poor BingBing has been racing around all day after you told him that you were looking after casting for the extras, and stipulated, “Nubile boy, they must be nubile”
Spot, as I said, send money, read the script. Our Catie is in the script. She plays a poor Palestinian mother of 42, who finds Israeli bullets outside her door, which despite appearing not to have been fired (ie; the bullets are still in the cases) unleashes a wave of condemnation upon the evil JOOs.
I feel like Martin Freakin’ Sheen in a Hanoi hotel room trying to explain this stuff to you people. Where’s the vodka?
January 13, 2009, 12:21 am at 12:21 am
Ok, I know he wasn’t in Hanoi, but Saigon, but you get the point, right? 🙂
January 13, 2009, 12:37 am at 12:37 am
Discipline, boys, discipline!
For starters, it was Kubrick, not Spielberg. Secondly, it was coke not smack, not that you producers need to worry about that. Ahem. And, given a splash of make-up here and there, the nubiles have already been sourced.
January 13, 2009, 12:48 am at 12:48 am
As the evil overlord er……………Senior Producer Bing, you have done well, my son in gripping up the Nubiles. By the way, will the coke dealer take a check?
Whoever it was, I’m the one copping all of this pressure. Fuck me, even Juilia the Woodpecker is involved, I didn’t want to make a porno, I wanted a serious film.
Um, Bing, are you really sure those ‘Nubiles’ are female? Just asking, I know that on your wage of 5 beers and all the rice you can eat you lose focus is all……..:)
January 13, 2009, 1:06 am at 1:06 am
Call me Luke. Pepsi will suffice until the small batch makes another appearance. Worry not. Already sourced. It will be fetched.
Male, female, Arab, Chinese… did I not mention a splash of makeup?
January 13, 2009, 1:14 am at 1:14 am
Splash young Jedi?
What building firm loaned you the paint sprayer? 🙂
January 13, 2009, 1:24 am at 1:24 am
Liza Minelli?!
January 13, 2009, 2:38 am at 2:38 am
Er… what building firm?
The pledge, yes. The turn, of course.
The prestige? Hey, bloke’s gotta make some coin, right?
January 13, 2009, 6:08 pm at 6:08 pm
“Hamas insurgent penetrates deep into sheep’s tunnel …”
January 13, 2009, 6:45 pm at 6:45 pm
Dear God Bing. Right, thats it, as executive producer I decree that you will not be having anything to do with the selection of the ‘nubiles’. In fact I will handle the ‘selection’ myself as I doubt we have room in the budget for that amount of makeup.
Yes I know it’s taxpayer funded, but I’m still a taxpayer…
January 13, 2009, 10:56 pm at 10:56 pm
Just sayin’ Woz, but word on the grapevine is they’re planning a remake of Priscilla Queen of the Desert. If we don’t get that make-up and those extra taxpayer dollars, well, I don’t wanna even go there.
January 13, 2009, 11:18 pm at 11:18 pm
That’s it! I’ve had it with you people f*cking up my creative mojo!
This was meant to be a serious love story, tied into an exploration of conflict. Not a freakin’ Priscilla remake (Bing, looking at you) or an excuse to ‘audition’ (possibly female) starlets (WOZ).
(Stalks off into the jungle in disgust…………) 🙂
January 13, 2009, 11:35 pm at 11:35 pm
Well, what can I say, these things happen when you’re trying to get yourself an arts grant mate.
It could be worse, teh gubmint may want you to do it from a ‘neo-pagan vegan feminist aboriginal perspective’…
Did I mention I want a body count that tops Rambo 4?
January 13, 2009, 11:39 pm at 11:39 pm
Aww, shucks. Just when I’d sourced the perfect goat and nubile, too.
January 14, 2009, 7:58 pm at 7:58 pm
W.T.F. Bing?!?!?! No really, wtf?
January 14, 2009, 10:12 pm at 10:12 pm
Relaaax. Fishing wire for any motion scenes (sourced a great Bollywood puppeteer) and a hairdryer (for the more intimate, er, moments) – it’ll be fine.
January 15, 2009, 4:36 am at 4:36 am
Don’t you even remember the classics?
That movie took sacrifice.
I have extras here.
It’s all set. All we need now is for director, Archer, to call take one.
On a dusty yellow plain, cursed sand whips the herder’s eyes. Piercing into his soul, the ancient dust brings a memory of life. A mother. Always remembered, necessarily ignored. For it must be so if Achmed’s goat is to survive the brazen ‘scape. His goat. His life. His livelihood. His nourishment in a world of oil and gold.
His final hope. For the herd was lost. Lost to the thirst of the desert. His family, supping with the gods. Woefully lost in a sea of tranquility, it was but Achmed and his goat.
A lonesome, quarrelsome pair, yet as one amidst the infinite tides. The tides, the cruel sweeping waves of the desert.
Sand.
But to count each grain would be to measure Achmed’s love for his final hope… his goat…
January 15, 2009, 5:33 am at 5:33 am
Bing,
The force is strong in you, would you consent to being the new Chief Scriptwriter? There’s no extra money, but you can sit in on WOZ’s ‘casting sessions’ if you want.
I would recommend against it, if you’re at all squeamish though.
Yours,
Pedro Archer,
Directoro
January 15, 2009, 10:49 am at 10:49 am
I’ll do it only if I don’t have to be there during WOZ’s ‘casting sessions’.
January 15, 2009, 7:46 pm at 7:46 pm
Sounds good to me, I’m not really the sharing type…