Greenspotting, with apologies to the original.


 

The original:

Not a bad film either...

Not a bad film either...

 
Warning a wee bit of swearing under the fold (well it is trainspotting Greenspotting)

Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television, Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players, and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol and dental insurance. Choose fixed- interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisure wear and matching luggage. Choose a three piece suite on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics. Choose DIY and wondering who you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing sprit- crushing game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pishing you last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked-up brats you have spawned to replace yourself. Choose your future. Choose life… But why would I want to do a thing like that?

 
RENTON: I chose not to choose life: I chose something else. And the reasons? There are no reasons. Who need reasons when you’ve got heroin?
 
The updated carbon friendly version.
 

 funny-pictures-tree-hugger-panda

 

mandatory green. Be assigned a job. Be assigned a career. Be denied a family of more than one kid. Be denied a fucking big television, Be denied washing machines, cars, compact disc players, and electrical tin openers. Be rationed good health, low cholesterol and dental insurance. Only one choice of fixed- interest government mortgage repayments. Be assigned a starter home. Denounce your friends. Be rationed leisure wear and matching luggage. Save your carbon coupons for a three piece suite on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics. No choice but to do DIY and wondering who you are on a Sunday morning. You can’t travel so Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing sprit- crushing state run media, stuffing fucking raw vegetables into your mouth. Be denied health care, rotting away at the end of it all, pishing you last in a miserable commune, nothing more than an embarrassment to yourself, because you never had fucked-up brats, you haven’t spawned to replace yourself. Government choosing your future. Choose Green… But why would I want to do a thing like that?

carbon_front_big

RENTON: I chose not to choose Green: I chose something else. And the reasons? There are no reasons. Who need reasons when you’ve got freedom?
 

7 Responses to “Greenspotting, with apologies to the original.”

  1. Greenspotting, with apologies to the original. | Vwfaq Site-Welcome to www.vwfaq.com Says:

    […] is the original post: Greenspotting, with apologies to the original. October 14th, 2009 | Tags: a-bad-film, a-starter-home-, a-wee-bit, and-dental, choose, […]

  2. bingbing Says:

    Good one Mole-ster!

  3. boy on a bike Says:

    Excellent work!

  4. spot_the_dog Says:

    Frollicking Mole looks to have gone from strength to strength since I was last here. Good on you. Good on all the admins/editors/authors here.

  5. Cock spooge Says:

    Go hug a tree you faeries! The men here have all been neutered or are retarded.!! The end!

    • Carpe Jugulum Says:

      faeries?????, what, we come from faerun?? my god you are a tool.

      How old are you knob-jockey 14, 15????? I’ll keep it simple for your low intellect.

      Is there a part of ‘fuck off & chew on the skidmarks from a hobo’s undies’ you don’t understand. There we go proof positive 1st cousins shouldn’t breed.

    • bingbing Says:

      Say again? The Queen’s English or even American English will suffice.

      Skim reading doesn’t always work. This is not a green blog.


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