Men are sometimes a touch odd


The other half alerted me to this touching story of the triumph of love over the brutal constraints of society….I wish she hadn’t. 

I have sex with my car! 

The man himself...

 

Like many men, Jordan Witham is obsessed with his car. But while most boy racers would draw the line at a wax and polish, his obsession has gone into overdrive.

The 20 year old is in love with his Volkswagen Beetle – and has been having sex with it for four years.

 

 

Jordan is one of just a handful of extreme car lovers in the world known as mechaphiles, and says his obsession was fuelled as a child. 

   

“I could feel myself falling in love while I worked on Ingo,” he says. “I once became so aroused, I started rubbing her bodywork and masturbating. It didn’t feel strange, just really exciting.

“After a few minutes, I felt a desire to connect with her further, so I had penetrative sex with the exhaust pipe.”
“I don’t always have sex with the car,” he explains. “Sometimes I stroke and kiss her bodywork, or rub myself up against her. If I’ve just been driving her, I have to wait for the exhaust pipe to cool down before I have sex. And I always use a condom because of all the dirt and dust inside.”

 

Pope Benedict disapproves or your tomfoolery!!

  

Now he has spent a further £200 on a “boy” car, a Trans Am he calls Todd, and is experimenting with a “gay” relationship.
 

Wrongness+wrongness is still wrong.

  

I have no words

  

I really, really wouldnt get this car alarm if  Mr Witham is in the area… 

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