Trunk Monkey

I would skip the 18 seconds intro

via Paco

The real life practical problems include care, feeding and cleaning up poo and this is why we need more research into mutant atomic-powered trunk monkeys.

Pike river follow up.

Bad news for the families of the miners lost in the Pike River mining accident.

The poor sods wont get the bodies back, conditions are unlikely to allow the safe retrieval of any remains for the forseeable future.

This was a fairly widespread opinion held by most mining crew Ive worked with, the scale of the fires/explosions and subsequent weakening of any ground support made this a likely outcome. But its a bitter pill for the families and friends to swallow. And for those who want to know why the bodies arent available Ill just ask, how many living mines rescue blokes are worth killing to retrieve the deceased? Its hard, but one live miner is worth 100 dead ones.

RIP blokes.

Im astounded and befuckled!

I had seen this video before but hadn’t been interested enough to watch it. I finally did and it has exploded my preconceptions of an everyday annoyance/safety device.

Traffic lights, everyone knows they are a necessary evil right? But we all endure because it would be worse without them right…..?

Watch these 2 vids and have an almost LSD-like expansion of your consciousness…

Me, while watching this...

Ht: The UK Libertarian

* Befuckled is a specalist medical term used by the charming lady who trained me as a medic. It comes when a student is in a profound state of befucklement and has hit a dead end. Once you work the problem out you cease to be befuckled or in a state of befucklement and become unbefuckled. Befucklement is a natrual stage in the process of learning.

I apologise if the terminology is a little advanced…..

Subway emergency intercom found to be faulty

What if there was a real emergency? This could well be not just specific to Taipai. Full story below.

… and there’s more there, too. Where TF is Mole and Gus??? Thanks GG.

Notice the shortage of handwringing

Somali pirates take over a Russian oil tanker. The Russians storm the ship, shoot and kill one of the pirates and capture the other 10 pirates. Rather than take them back to Moscow for prosecution they dumped the 10 pirates into an inflatable raft and set them adrift in the Indian Ocean.

“It seems that they all died,” the unnamed source was quoted as saying by Russia’s Interfax news agency.

Who knows, they may have even pointed them in the direction of land. Perhaps Antarctica.

A missed opportunity…

Now this is either the bravest or stupidest man in the world, I angling for stupid myself.

Still it took a lot of balls…

Streaker stuns Crufts judges by running into arena

..As competitors watched the judging of the Gundog group on the fourth day of the canine showcase, the man ran into the arena at the National Exhibition Centre (NEC) in Birmingham…

Now I dont know about you but I wouldnt pick a dog show as the perfect place to run around unclothed.

Look out its a FURRY!!!!Look out doggies its a furry!!! (link NSFW)

Mind you if someone had a laser pointer in the crowd it could have been quite amusing..


You know how George W Bush is a creep? Cheney more so? But surely that’s no reason not to dance, right?

Shed that love fat, leftards.


Posted in Safety. 1 Comment »

Pure evil

Definitely not for the feint-hearted. In fact, all of this post is going below the fold. It happened to a nine-year-old Korean girl known as Na-young. The 57 year old man is Jo Du-sun. Read the rest of this entry »

Flying High

Thank Goodness The Wizard of WOZ sent me this after my recent trip to Australia and back. I can’t verify the authenticity, but who cares?

Actual exchanges between pilots and control towers.

Tower: “Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o’clock, 6 miles!”
Delta 351: “Give us another hint! We have digital watches!”

Tower: “TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 Degrees.”
TWA 2341: “Center, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?”
Tower: “Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?”

From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue: “I’m f…ing bored!”

Ground Traffic Control: “Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately!”
Unknown aircraft: “I said I was f…ing bored, not f…ing stupid!”

O’Hare Approach Control to a 747: “United 329 heavy, your traffic is a Fokker, one o’clock, three miles, Eastbound.”
United 329: “Approach, I’ve always wanted to say this…I’ve got the little Fokker in sight.”

A student became lost during a solo cross-country flight. While attempting to locate the aircraft on radar, ATC asked, “What was your last known position?”
Student: “When I was number one for takeoff.”

A DC-10 had come in a little hot and thus had an exceedingly long roll out after touching down. San Jose Tower noted:
“American 751, make a hard right turn at the end of the runway, if you are able. If you are not able, take the Guadeloupe exit off Highway 101, make a right at the lights and return to the airport.”

A Pan Am 727 flight, waiting for start clearance in Munich, overheard the following:
Lufthansa (in German): “Ground, what is our start clearance time?”
Ground (in English): “If you want an answer you must speak in English.”
Lufthansa (in English): “I am a German, flying a German airplane, in Germany . Why must I speak English?”
Unknown voice from another plane (in a beautiful British accent): “Because you lost the bloody war!”

Tower: “Eastern 702, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on frequency 124.7”
Eastern 702: “Tower, Eastern 702 switching to Departure. By the way,after we lifted off we saw some kind of dead animal on the far end of the runway.”
Tower: “Continental 635, cleared for takeoff behind Eastern 702, contact Departure on frequency 124.7. Did you copy that report from Eastern 702?”
Continental 635: “Continental 635, cleared for takeoff, roger; and yes, we copied Eastern… we’ve already notified our caterers.”

One day the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the tower to hold short of the active runway while a DC-8 landed. The DC-8 landed, rolled out, turned around, and taxied back past the Cherokee. Some quick-witted comedian in the DC-8 crew got on the radio and said, “What a cute little plane. Did you make it all by yourself?”
The Cherokee pilot, not about to let the insult go by, came back with a real zinger: “I made it out of DC-8 parts. Another landing like yours and I’ll have enough parts for another one.”

The German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a short-tempered lot. They not only expect one to know one’s gate parking location, but how to get there without any assistance from them. So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign Speedbird 206.
Speedbird 206: ” Frankfurt , Speedbird 206! clear of active runway.”
Ground: “Speedbird 206. Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven.”
The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.

Ground: “Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?”
Speedbird 206: “Stand by, Ground, I’m looking up our gate location now.”
Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): “Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?”
Speedbird 206 (coolly): “Yes, twice in 1944, but it was dark, — And I didn’t land.”

While taxiing at London’s Airport, the crew of a US Air flight departing for Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727..
An irate female ground controller lashed out at the US Air crew, screaming: “US Air 2771, where the hell are you going? I told you to turn right onto Charlie taxiway! You turned right on Delta! Stop right there. I know it’s difficult for you to tell the difference between C and D, but get it right!”
Continuing her rage to the embarrassed crew, she was now shouting hysterically: “God! Now you’ve screwed everything up! It’ll take forever to sort this out! You stay right there and don’t move till I tell you to! You can expect progressive taxi instructions in about half an hour, and I want you to go exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you! You got that, US Air 2771?”
“Yes, ma’am,” the humbled crew responded.
Naturally, the ground control communications frequency fell terribly silent after the verbal bashing of US Air 2771. Nobody wanted to chance engaging the irate ground controller in her current state of mind.. Tension in every cockpit out around Gatwick was definitely running high. Just then an unknown pilot broke the silence and keyed his microphone, asking:”Wasn’t I married to you once?”

I should be so cocky. The flight out of Narita had to return to base. Air-conditioning problem they reckoned. Next day, heard anecdotal claims flames were seen coming from one on the engines during takeoff the night before.

Real Death by Chocolate

I’m not kidding.

“A 22-year-old factory worker died Wednesday after he fell into a vat of boiling chocolate at a manufacturing plant in New Jersey, police said.

The Camden County prosecutor’s office identified the victim as Vincent Smith II. He was a temporary worker at the Cocoa Services Inc. plant.”

Fucking New Guys. Always trying to nick some free cocoa.


Eco-Tards Would Have Us All Drive “Insightfully”

Top Gear’s Jeremy Clarkson drives the new Honda Insight.

“Much has been written about the Insight, Honda’s new low-priced hybrid. We’ve been told how much carbon dioxide it produces, how its dashboard encourages frugal driving by glowing green when you’re easy on the throttle and how it is the dawn of all things. The beginning of days.

So far, though, you have not been told what it’s like as a car; as a tool for moving you, your friends and your things from place to place.

So here goes. It’s terrible. Biblically terrible. Possibly the worst new car money can buy. It’s the first car I’ve ever considered crashing into a tree, on purpose, so I didn’t have to drive it any more.”

Oh, Jeremy’s just warming up.

“The Honda’s petrol engine is a much-shaved, built-for-economy, low-friction 1.3 that, at full chat, makes a noise worse than someone else’s crying baby on an airliner. It’s worse than the sound of your parachute failing to open. Really, to get an idea of how awful it is, you’d have to sit a dog on a ham slicer.”

Now he’s in full song.

“Because the Honda has two motors, one that runs on petrol and one that runs on batteries, it is more expensive to make than a car that has one. But since the whole point of this car is that it could be sold for less than Toyota’s Smugmobile, the engineers have plainly peeled the suspension components to the bone. The result is a ride that beggars belief.

There’s more. Normally, Hondas feel as though they have been screwed together by eye surgeons. This one, however, feels as if it’s been made from steel so thin, you could read through it. And the seats, finished in pleblon, are designed specifically, it seems, to ruin your skeleton. This is hairy-shirted eco-ism at its very worst.”

Every paragraph is quotable, so you should read the whole enchilada. This is the pain eco-tards want us all to feel.

Another Clarkson classic.

Yes, this is the future of Obamanation Government Motors.

H/T Prof Bainbrigde, which you should also read.

One for the ladies, Restraining orders.

This post is intended to give  a little bit of advicefor ladies who may be seeking a restraining order against a violent or abusive ex-partner. (or weirdo)

Its written from an Australian legal perspective, but I think the general nature of the advice will be helpful to most people in this situation.


First off I’m not a lawyer, however I am a Justice of the Peace in Western Australia and am authorised to grant restraining orders, so I am speaking with a bit of legal knowledge on this subject.


One of my biggest worries with ladies that seek restraining orders is that often it is the woman who feels shame in seeking the order in the first place. I can understand some feelings of embarrassment, regret, or even “what the f#ck was I thinking”  regarding the situation, however it must be said the shame should be on the violator, not the victim.

To many times ladies feel the need to keep quiet, even to neighbours and friends, the fact that they have a person they are concerned enough about to be in fear of assault. This is all topsy turvey. Ladies, if you have been assaulted you aren’t to blame for anything other than misjudging the bloke you were with.


As for the blokes (and usually it is a bloke, so I will use the male as my example for simplicity) who do this. You are dickheads. If you were dumb enough to abuse a woman you pretty well automatically should be out of her life. You are no better than a bloke who kicks his dog or hits kids. Its not big nor is it clever.

If you beat or stalk women, this is you.

If you beat or stalk women, this is you.

More below the fold. Read the rest of this entry »

Reason number 1, why I wont go to Africa (or Asia)

find a happy place, find a happy place....

find a happy place, find a happy place....


Oh dear, the poor bloke, and just what would you put on his headstone? Read the rest of this entry »

Sometimes, there are just no words… (via Mythusmage)

Jared Yaffe

Jared Yaffe

Cross-posted from Mythusmage , regarding the man pictured above from this news piece.

And Then There is Vile

The face you see in this picture, that of one Jared Ravin Yaffe, is the face of a pedophile. But not the sort who has an affair with a young adolescent boy or girl. No, Mr. Yaffe is the kind of pedophile who preys upon very young children. In one case an infant just a year in age. He is reported as saying it didn’t matter if the toddler in question agreed to what Yaffe intended to do or not, since he couldn’t talk.

Yaffe was aided by one Aaron Zendejas, who provided victims and videotaped the acts in return for cash. Zendejas as a procurer and enabler bears a great deal of responsibility for the acts. but it is Yaffe who committed the acts, and so bears a much greater culpability.

Jared Ravin Yaffe is a violent sexual predator. He is a clear and present danger to society as a whole, and to children in particular. He is a rapist, using sex to cause pain and instill fear in his victims. He targets the very young because he is ill; he needs to control and dominate through pain and terror, using sex and sexual acts to instill that pain and terror.

The man is on the loose. So long as he is on the loose society is in danger, most especially the young. At the moment he is thought to be in the San Diego CA area, but he may have gone elsewhere. That’s why I’ve posted this.

Spread the word about Jared Ravin Yaffe; link to the story and his picture so that people will know about this and know what he looks like. The sooner he is caught, the sooner his threat to children and their parents can be ended. Contact your local authorities if you spot Jared Ravin Yaffe or have any information that can lead to his apprehension.

Let’s get this fucker off the street.

McCain’s Perfect Choice for a Running Mate: Governor Sarah Palin

While most of the pedantic, two-dimensional, inside-the-box-thinking, conservative political hacks are touting Tom Ridge for the slot (Not a bad guy, but…), David Freddoso notes a far superior choice has been proposed: The Republican Governor of Alaska, Sarah Palin.

I believe this is a truly inspired idea. Gov. Palin ran as an anti-corruption outsider, and handily defeated a corrupt and entrenched Republican political machine. Plus, at 44, she would almost totally wipe the “age issue” McCain has off the slate, and since Obama is only two years her senior, there is no way they could attack her for her youth and inexperience: She has much more executive experience than Senator Obama has.

Not to mention the fact that, she’s a gorgeous woman who exudes mass quantities of charisma…


and has a super-solid family life.


Dibs on the eldest daughter! LOL!

This inspired choice would allow McCain to actually capitalize on his “maverick” persona, as Gov. Palin shook Alaska politics to the core: She’s a charming, charismatic woman, but she can also play with the big boys and kick ass.

What say ye?

UPDATE: Things are looking optimistic!

UPDATE II: Welcome to all 4500 8000 40,000 in the past few hours (so far!) people visiting us from Google. We’re a fairly opinionated right-wing blog, and you might like to take a look at our “About” page. You might also be interested in our other coverage of Sarah Palin and whether she becomes a prospective Vice President of the United States. You can find this coverage here and here. Personally, I hope she does, but you can feel free to debate the idea in comments below. All first comments are moderated, but unless you either insult or use severe profanity (and I mean severe by my standards, which generally only means the C U Next Tuesday word or the implication that someone has had a rather enjoyable erotic experience with someone who has borne a child), however if you come up with a new one, I may simply delete your comment. I, and all other contributors to this blog are more than fair in what we permit.

UPDATE III: Nayr Drahcir, don’t bother even trying. You will not be published.

UPDATE IV: A lot of people must like Palin.

UPDATE V: More coverage of Governor Sarah Palin and a theme song here.

UPDATE VI: Funniest observation on the announcement yet: “Put Obama and Palin on a basketball court one on one. Winner takes all!”

UPDATE VII: [spot_the_dog] No, we do not have any pictures of “Sarah Palin + Naked,” nor do we have any of “Sarah Palin + Swimsuit.” In the past 24 hours, there have been 157 separate searches on this site for “Sarah Palin Swimsuit,” and 161 separate searches for “Sarah Palin Naked.” I repeat, we have no bathing suit, swim suit, bikini, or naked pictures of Sarah Palin. What kind of people do you think we are, anyway? 😉

UPDATE VIIa: [spot_the_dog] Ace has noticed a similar search phenomenon on his blog and has a theory…

UPDATE VIII: A well-rounded view of the selection of Sarah Palin for the Vice President Nomination can be found here.

UPDATE IX:  We got it!  YES!  Nude photo of Sarah Palin right here!  (C’mon.  You know you want to click.)

UPDATE X: Feel free to visit our main page and read the latest posts we’ve written.

Flight to London makes emergency landing after co-pilot suffers mental breakdown

The co-pilot of a Heathrow-bound plane was dragged kicking and screaming from the cockpit after suffering a mental breakdown while in control of the flight.

He began yelling and “invoking God” as the Air Canada 767 flew at 37,000 feet over the Atlantic. He was held down by other crew members and a passenger, a member of the Canadian armed forces.

The co-pilot then had restraints fastened to his wrists and ankles and was handcuffed to a seat.

The flight from Toronto made an emergency landing in Shannon and the co-pilot, who had been crying and screaming according to witnesses, was taken off the plane.

He was taken by ambulance to a psychiatric ward where he is being treated for a suspected nervous breakdown.

Daily Mail UK

Gee, to bad sport. Hope you get the proper help and all works out fine for ya’.

OH, this is just one of the reasons I’m not to damn crazy (sorry bloke) about flying. Thankfully, this flight landed safely and the gentleman removed. Seeing a flyer of the plane being carted off strapped down, kinda’ makes my stomach queasy. Anyone see the movie “Airplane”? If not, read the rest…it’s similar to the movie, “Airplane”, only real.

Coming back to what I mentioned about not really being a fan of flying. Had this happened were I aboard this flight, this crazy bastard would have screamed over the plane intercom…”I’m takin” this son-of-a-bitch down, you are all going to hell”.

Specifically related to me, he would have been correct in screaming this shit. I am going straight to hell, I just want it to be on my terms, not some fucking loon’s.

An Important Safety Message

Do not, I repeat, do not, run down wooden stairs with nylon stockings on your feet.

Drop Bears

Warning: The rest of this post is quite alarming, so only click for more if you think you’re prepared for it.

Read the rest of this entry »

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